Recently, while scrolling through social media (in my very limited, sanity-preserving way), I heard someone talking about “natural menopause.”

I really, really hate that term.

Not because menopause isn’t natural—it absolutely is—but because of what that phrase implies. That there’s a right way to do menopause. That if you veer off the prescribed path—by, say, taking Menopause Hormone Therapy (MHT)—you’re somehow doing it wrong.

And honestly, it reminds me of another term that has been relentlessly thrown at us: Natural birth.

Natural Birth: What Does That Really Mean?

When I was pregnant, I received every subtle (and not-so-subtle) message that a natural birth was superior. That my body was “made” for this. That interventions—epidurals, C-sections, induction—were somehow a failure rather than legitimate medical options. That these interventions are often overused and the repercussions of these interventions are a complete topic for another day.

But here’s the thing: for centuries, childbirth has been dangerous. Women died. Women still die. And while modern medicine has significantly reduced maternal mortality rates, we’re still dealing with the cultural residue of an era where women’s pain was dismissed, and survival was a roll of the dice.

The idea that “natural” birth is somehow superior ignores the reality that without medical advancements, many of us wouldn’t be here. Myself included. It also conveniently glosses over the fact that different women experience childbirth differently—some have quick, uncomplicated labours, while others endure days of agony, medical complications, or trauma.

And yet, women are still guilted into believing that using pain relief or accepting medical intervention is somehow “less than.”
Sound familiar?

Because the exact same thing is happening with the menopause narrative.

The “Natural” Menopause Trap

Like birth, menopause is natural—however, it happens. Whether you sail through with barely a symptom or get hit by every goddamn one like a freight train. Whether you take MHT or don’t. Whether you embrace, rage against, or feel every shade in between.

And yet, the phrase natural menopause lingers in the air, often with an unspoken caveat: Natural menopause is best.

Which raises the same questions:

1. If MHT isn’t natural, does that mean taking it is unnatural?
2. That managing symptoms with medical support is wrong?
3. That we should suffer through because “it’s just part of the process”?

The Problem with “Natural” Narratives in Women’s Health

Here’s where language gets tricky:

When we label something natural, it automatically sounds superior—pure, wholesome, better. But what’s left unsaid is often more important than what’s said.
Because when we dig deeper, we see that these narratives aren’t neutral. They are built on the historical medical bias that women’s pain is not taken as seriously as men’s—and that bias has real, measurable consequences.

Research shows that:

Women’s pain is more likely to be dismissed by medical professionals. A 2019 study in the Journal of Pain Research found that women wait longer than men for pain relief in emergency settings, even when presenting with the same symptoms.
Women of colour experience even greater medical neglect. A 2016 study in PNAS found that nearly half of medical students surveyed believed Black patients felt less pain than white patients—leading to undertreatment of pain.

Women with chronic pain conditions, including endometriosis and fibromyalgia, are more likely to be told their symptoms are psychosomatic rather than receiving proper medical investigation.

This isn’t about conspiracy theories—it’s about centuries of medical bias shaping how women’s symptoms are perceived and treated.

And menopause? It’s the same old story.

Many doctors still dismiss menopausal symptoms as “just part of aging.” They downplay hot flushes, brain fog, and joint pain as if they’re mere inconveniences rather than signs of significant hormonal shifts that impact long-term health.

And because women’s health has historically been underfunded and under-researched, we’re left with outdated information, conflicting advice, and a cultural script that tells us to just grit our teeth and get through it.

Menopause: A Window of Opportunity (and Vulnerability)

I often describe menopause as both a window of opportunity and a time of vulnerability—and how we navigate that window can shape the decades ahead.

The Opportunity?

Many women find that midlife brings a shift. Many women start caring less about what other people think, stop playing the people-pleasing game, and begin to advocate for ourselves in ways we never have before.

I spent a large part of my life being “nice. ” This translates to not ruffling feathers, being a good girl, mother, and professional. And it’s no surprise why—society rewards that behaviour in women.

But recognising those patterns is the first step to breaking them. And breaking them? That’s where the real opportunity lies.

We get to make space for ourselves and prioritise our health—physically, mentally, and emotionally. Whether that means taking the time to go to the gym, walking daily, changing our diet, or even taking MHT, these are all valid choices that deserve support, not stigma.

The Vulnerability?

The biggest risk in menopause isn’t just the symptoms—it’s falling into the trap of not challenging our old habits.

Many of the diseases that kill or disable women—dementia, heart disease, osteoporosis, diabetes, pelvic floor dysfunction —start or accelerate at menopause. Why? Because when oestrogen leaves the building, it takes a lot of our body’s natural defences with it.

That’s why so many of us suddenly experience:

• Brain fog and memory lapses (oestrogen plays a critical role in brain function)
• Joint pain and muscle loss (oestrogen supports muscle mass and joint lubrication)
• Bone density loss (hello, osteoporosis risk)
• Increased risk of heart disease (oestrogen helps regulate cholesterol and blood vessels)
• Pelvic floor dysfunction – incontinence is the single biggest reason that women are admitted into aged care facilities

And yet, here we are, still debating whether it’s “natural” to take action.

MHT: It’s Not for Everyone, But It Should Be a Choice

Let’s be clear: MHT doesn’t work for everyone. And not everyone should take it.

But here’s what shouldn’t be happening:
Women suffering needlessly because they’ve been told to “tough it out” or not had their symptoms taken seriously.

Professionals not connecting the dots with menopausal symptoms.

Women being told MHT is risky when the research actually shows most healthy women under 60 can take it without fear.

Women who want MHT but can’t access it because their doctor is misinformed or dismissive.

The latest guidelines from the North American Menopause Society state:

“Most healthy women under 60 or within 10 years of their last period can take hormone therapy without fear—whether it’s oestrogen alone or combined with progesterone.”

And yet, only 15-20% of women suffering through menopause are actually accessing it.

Why?

Because language shapes perception. And perception shapes access.

Call Bullshit & Make the Choices That Serve You

So, I call bullshit on terms like natural menopause.

I call bullshit on the idea that suffering is some kind of moral high ground.

And I say: give the middle finger to anything that doesn’t serve you.

If you want to explore hormones, do it. If you don’t, that’s fine too. But don’t let fear-mongering language about what’s “natural” make your decision for you.

Because midlife shouldn’t be the Misery Olympics.

And no one wins a medal for suffering.